A few of the important qualities that need to be considered while taking a decision regarding the selection of a Muslim life partner besides a reasonable level of socio-economic compatibility between the man and the woman, may be: A strong adherence to the universally accepted and acknowledged ethical and moral values; A positive sense of attachment with Islamic beliefs values and practices; Empathy toward others; Tolerance in the face of difference of opinion; and A reasonable ability of intercommunication (not only the ability to convey his own ideas but also to listen to others and to consider their ideas with an open mind). I am sure you will appreciate that this list can go on endlessly. Nevertheless, in my opinion, these are some of the major qualities that a person should possess to face the various situations that one is likely to encounter in life. The matter, however, is not directly related to the Qur'an and the Sunnah . These qualities are based on one's own views and ideals. The list can therefore be altered according to one's own inclinations. The Shari`ah does not impose any restrictions on the age difference between a husband and a wife. Nevertheless, as you have mentioned, there are certain norms of the society in this regard. However, these norms do not entail any religious reverence and there are an adequate number of successful exceptions to these norms to suggest that these are mere traditions and do not deserve any sanctity. A successful marriage, as you know, is actually a successful interpersonal relation between two individuals. The mere fact that human beings can, at times, be highly unpredictable in their responses and reactions does not allow us to draw any universal principles for the success (or the failure) for marriages. September 26, 2000 Answer published by Moiz Amjad