Title: Marriage Ceremonies in Interfaith Marriages Question: At the end of high school, I met and fell in love with a Muslim friend of mine; however I am Christian. We are very committed to each other, despite our long-distance relationship between New York and Texas. We are both juniors in college, and are planning to get married a few years after graduation. However, ever since I was a little girl, I've dreamt about a perfect, traditional, American Christian wedding ceremony and reception. We have agreed that I will retain my faith, but are rather confused about what our actual wedding will entail. I found your article, "Regarding Muslim Marriage Ceremonies," to be very helpful, although I have a few more perplexing questions. I will greatly enjoy having a unique wedding, but I do wish to retain some of the elements, which define a wedding ceremony in my eyes, according to the way I have been raised in the American society. The ceremony is very important to me, and I would like to have the white gown, the rings, the bridesmaids, the vows (although they will be undenominational, of course), the flowers, etc. I understand that there is a contract signing involved in the Muslim ceremony, which will add to the joy of it for me. However, would the practice of these American wedding traditions be forbidden, even though they are cultural and do not mention/suggest religion? My boyfriend is concerned that cultural practices would not be allowed. Also, is there a possibility that representatives from both religions (a minister, for my side, and whomever he chooses for his) each be allowed to say a word of blessing for the couple (possibly just mentioning God/Allah, and not other elements of the faiths)? Can the wedding take place at any appropriate, neutral location? Are there other aspects of Muslim ceremonies, which we should include? And finally, my boyfriend tells me that it is their tradition to have more than one reception, but our tradition is to have one reception immediately following the ceremony. Does Islam dictate anything regarding the reception, or is that merely a matter of family tradition? Do you know what other inter-religious couples have done in this issue? Thank you so much for your guidance; I greatly appreciate it. Sincerely, Answer: All the necessary customs in a Muslim marriage are given in my response, which you have referred in your letter [1] . It is not necessary to follow any other wedding traditions and customs. Nevertheless, this does not mean that Islam prohibits following any other customs in weddings. It is only that Islam does not make any other customs a necessary part of its wedding ceremonies. Keeping this principle in perspective, let us now turn to your specific questions: You ask: I would like to have the white gown, the rings, the bridesmaids, the vows (although they will be undenominational, of course), the flowers, etc. Islam has no objections to any of these cultural traditions. However, Islam discourages pompous celebrations and extravagance. I would therefore advise that these functions should not entail any of these elements. You ask: My boyfriend is concerned that cultural practices would not be allowed. This is not correct. Islam would only object to those cultural norms, which inherently entail any immoral or unethical elements. You ask: Also, is there a possibility that representatives from both religions (a minister, for my side, and whomever he chooses for his) each be allowed to say a word of blessing for the couple (possibly just mentioning God/Allah, and not other elements of the faiths)? There is no harm in doing so. You ask: Can the wedding take place at any appropriate, neutral location? Yes. You ask: Are there other aspects of Muslim ceremonies, which we should include? All necessary Muslim ceremonies are included in my referred responses. No other Muslim ceremonies are a necessary part of the wedding ceremony. You ask: ... my boyfriend tells me that it is their tradition to have more than one reception, but our tradition is to have one reception immediately following the ceremony. Does Islam dictate anything regarding the reception, or is that merely a matter of family tradition? Giving more than one reception is not a religious but a socio-cultural tradition. Islam only prescribes one reception, but does not restrict the number of receptions to one. You may give one or more receptions. Nevertheless, Islam only requires you to have one. You ask: Do you know what other inter-religious couples have done in this issue? I am extremely sorry for not being able to help you on that. No strict tradition has yet been evolved in this regard. I hope this helps. October 29, 2000 [1] Reference is to my response titled " Regarding Muslim Marriage Ceremonies ". For any further clarification, the reader may also refer to one of my other responses titled " Marriage Laws and Ceremonies ".