Title: Interaction Between a Non-Muslim and his Recently Converted Ex-Partner Question: Hi, I am a single non-Muslim but I am fairly well read regarding Islam, and I have a question regarding my ex-partner who has recently converted to Islam. We had been partners for 18 months and engaged for 12 of those, my ex also has a daughter from a previous relationship who I have come to regard as my own daughter. We do not live together but I regard my ex as a friend and her daughter as my own, I also feel it is my moral duty to provide assistance to them (both financially and practically). I don't want to compromise my ex by seeing her in a situation that would be regarded as prohibited, I thought seeing her in her own home with her daughter as a chaperone (she is 11 ½ years old) and not being left alone in the same room would be ok, but she has been told by people within the Muslim community that this is not acceptable. I would still like to see my step daughter and also help out with repairs to my ex's house as she has physical difficulties, and also interact on a social/platonic level with her as I respect her opinion on life. Could you please tell me what is accepted and what is prohibited? Should I just not see either of them anymore? I am a bit confused and just want to respect my ex, her faith and act as a father to her daughter (she has no other father figure in her life). I hope you can clarify this situation for me, Thank-you. Answer: What you have stated cannot be deemed prohibited based on Islam's doctrine. As a matter of fact your actions are quite noble and we would even commend you the way you have treated the matter. Giving help and being a positive role model is a blessing to those who get it from you and a blessing from God upon you, insha'Allah. Though it is not prohibited for you to interact with the woman and her daughter in their home it is risky from a cultural sense. The reaction may be negative from the community in which your friend lives in or the people she socializes with. There is also another danger to consider that may be lurking that could creep up even though you think it not possible at the moment; Satan can easily whisper his suggestions to the both of you to commit acts you know you should not be doing. After 18 months of being "partners" surely there were some feelings of affection then and most likely some remain now. These can cause us a moment of weakness and we may get into something wrong. The presence of an 11-year old is nice but as you are an adult you know that there are ways to preoccupy a child. Nevertheless, I am neither giving you advice to keep doing what you have been nor am I saying that you should stop. Rather, the point is to give you an answer based on the Shari'ah (i.e. Islamic Law) and other points that you may want to consider when making such a decision. Regardless of what choice you make regarding going over to the young lady's house, it is my opinion that you should not desert, at least, the child. If the child sees you as her father-figure and you provide that type of wonderful support then you should never deprive her of it. The bond between you, the mother and the daughter is not prohibited but there are elements that you need to be real wise with. Do not forget the social acceptance, especially with Muslims, of such a relationship. I am not sure of the circumstances but having such care in your heart maybe you can rekindle the love to marry this woman and make life easier for the both of you. Pray to the Almighty to help you make the right decisions, He will give you wisdom. I hope I have clarified the issue. God knows best. Ronnie Hassan March 20, 2005