Title: Dating Which Leads To Later Marridge Question: Assalamualaikum , I have read the issue of dating and the answers that have been given. They are good answers which have good basis. My question is if a young guy and a young lady go out together within their boundaries (they do not do anything haraam together) and they avoid going to questionable places, they have feelings for each other but restrain from having physical contact but the fact remains they are going on a 'date' together and they continue doing so because as argued earlier, modern society does not allow for early marriage... they make a pact to marry a few yrs later down the road when both are financially and emotionally stable.. how does Islam view this ? Aliff Answer: My dear brother, if humans acted in as calculated and predictable a manner as you have outlined in your question/comment, many of our problems could so easily have been resolved. The fact is that humans do not act in a manner as calculated as you have assumed. We are all prone to sudden surges of anger, love, emotion and the like. A 'smooth going' can suddenly be turned into no-win situation, which we could not have predicted even minutes before hand. It is because of the unpredictable nature of human interaction that even 'happy marriages' can sometimes end in 'tragic separations'. If a boy and a girl are not 'financially and emotionally' stable to enter into regular marriage, then you can easily imagine how easy it can be to break a 'pact', which they had entered into at a time of emotional and mental immaturity. Islamic teachings in this respect are not only to make it easy upon individuals to take a path of intellectual, moral and physical cleansing but also to safeguard men and women from ill-repute and defamation. Islam wants the society to value honor and good repute and is, therefore, emphatic upon giving a shape to the society, which would safeguard the 'repute' and 'good name' for its members. Whatever alternatives we may be tempted to adopt, we must not forget that they shall have a deep impact on our social and socio-psychological values. If we truly want to allow 'dating' and 'courtship' in the society, then we should also be prepared to relieve ourselves of phenomena like chastity, repute and confidence in the loyalty of our relations. I hope this helps. Regards, Moiz Amjad September 19, 2001